numb

My body feels fake.
My head won't stop hurting.
I feel as if I were dead,
but I could only wish I was.
I just want to be okay.
I just want it all to go away.
Searching for relief in a drug that minorly smoothes my dread only to find more problems I'm causing myself. Stucked in its addictive trance of false claims of satisfaction, and nirvana. I have no command over my own composure. I only wish I had the self control to overcome my urge for yet another line of what I want to believe makes me "feel better". I sicken my self